By JAN McLAUGHLIN
BG Independent News
Seventy years ago, Ralph and Patricia Burnside bought a couple wedding bands in Bowling Green and headed south to get hitched.
“We had no idea where we were going,” Ralph said, showing a photo of the $22.81 receipt from Klever’s Jewelers for both gold bands.
The young couple ended up on the banks of the Ohio River, in Lawrenceburg, Indiana, where they were wed on July 4, 1954.
Their wedding day was not selected because of the Independence Day holiday, but for a more practical reason, Pat said.
“That was a weekend and we had a couple days off,” she said.
When the newlyweds returned home to Cygnet, just south of Bowling Green, their big news wasn’t exactly a hit with either of their parents.
“They didn’t approve of it. But there wasn’t much they could do about it,” Ralph recalled. “I don’t regret it a bit.”
On Wednesday, the Burnsides, who now live in Bowling Green, were celebrating their 70th anniversary over lunch at the Wood County Senior Center.
“The worst part of it is you have to get old to do it,” Ralph said with a smile. “It’s gone by fast, it really has.”
Ralph and Pat grew up a block apart in Cygnet, but didn’t really get to know each other until Ralph’s senior year in high school when he was chosen for a lead in the school play. As a bit of serendipity, the senior class had only three girls – not enough to fill the female roles in the play.
So a search turned up Patricia Slaughterbeck, a sophomore willing to play a part.
Pat had no speaking part, but she helped Ralph learn his lines as the lead.
“We studied together,” Ralph said. “We got to know each other in that play. We just hit it off.”
When they eloped after both graduated, the young couple was rich in love, but otherwise very poor. They returned to Cygnet, but had no place to live – so they rented a place in Bowling Green for $60 a month.
“When we got married, we hardly had any money,” Pat said.
“We had nothing,” Ralph said.
Ralph, who worked 37.5 years as a land surveyor for the state, was earning $1 an hour when they wed – adding up to $2,880 a year. Pat worked as a legal secretary at the county courthouse.
The Burnsides were dirt poor, but so were most of the people they knew back then. Their poverty helped the young couple set their priorities, they said. They had to rely on each other.
Eventually, the Burnsides were able to build a house in Cygnet – doing 90% of the construction themselves, Pat said.
There they raised their two children, Robyn and Larry. Money was always tight, but they saved up for the necessities, like automobiles.
Pat recalled the first time they couldn’t put down the full amount on a car. The fact that they still owed on the car ate away at Ralph.
“We never borrowed money again,” Pat said.
For their children, the Burnsides valued education and quality footwear.
“We wanted our kids to have good shoes,” Pat said. Each child had one pair of church shoes and one pair of play shoes. When the church shoes got too ragged, they became the play shoes, she explained.
The Burnside’s daughter, Robyn remembers as a child pleading with her parents for a skateboard. It was a luxury they just couldn’t afford.
“Dad made me a skateboard,” Robyn said, as she and her husband, Bob Moellenberg, joined her parents for lunch at the senior center. “I was the first kid in Cygnet to have a skateboard. I still have it.”
And of course, it’s as solid as the day her dad built it.
“I use it to move heavy things,” Robyn’s husband said with a grin.
Robyn and Bob, who just celebrated their marriage of 47 years, learned a bit from her folks.
“You’ve got to stick to it. There are bumps in the road, but you always stick to it,” Robyn said.
Many of those bumps are over money. In the early years of their marriage, neighbors helped each other through tough times, Pat recalled. Nothing was wasted. Once clothes were outgrown, they were given to someone they would fit.
“Everything we had you’d give away,” she said. “I grew up that way. There was nothing left unused in your drawers. You gave it to someone who could use it.”
The generosity came back full circle, Pat said.
“Everything you give away, you get back.”
Before the Burnsides got too old, they set aside money for traveling, seeing Europe and taking cruises. Ralph was particularly fond of the endless food on cruises, often partaking of midnight ice cream treats.
“He never missed it,” Pat said, glancing at Ralph.
“Don’t believe anything she says,” Ralph said, giving a sideways glance at his wife of 70 years.
“The secret is marrying someone you get along with,” Ralph said. “Just pick the right person.”
And don’t throw in the towel with every little spat. “If you have a fight, don’t give up,” Ralph said.
And don’t forget to celebrate the success – even if it’s not as spectacular as the Burnsides’ built in annual festivities.
“Fireworks go off every year for us,” Pat said, smiling.
