By JAN LARSON McLAUGHLIN
BG Independent News
Dads have a way of depositing nuggets of knowledge with their children – some delivered through long-winded lectures, some through loving actions, and some with just a stern look. Often the advice is rejected until years later, when it finally clicks.
On this Father’s Day, some Bowling Green residents shared words of wisdom from their dads – advice that has helped them become who they are today.
Michael Penrod was part of the fourth generation to live on the family’s farm. His dad, Paul E. Penrod, born in 1934, was a strong advocate for private property rights.
“Once we were re-marking a property line before new neighbors moved in and Dad said, ‘Never tell your neighbor what to do on their side of the fence, unless what they are doing is coming over to our side of the fence,’” recalled Michael, director of the Wood County District Public Library.
“He was also very careful to make sure nothing of ours (mainly our cows) went over the fence onto their property.”
As the person doing most of the fence maintenance at the time, Michael took the advice to heart.
“I had little choice. I had daily lessons thanks to one particular cow that loved to head for the neighbor’s garden,” Michael recalled.
His dad’s words ring true beyond the farm.
“I have often thought of his advice many times over the years, including with my work at the library. We try to be a good neighbor with all of downtown, with the city, and with residents near the Carter House,” Michael said.
His dad worked as a meteorologist for the U.S. Air Force for 27 years at the Air Force Measurement Standards Laboratories located at Newark Air Force Base in Heath, Ohio. Much of his work was classified and he could not talk about it, so as a child Michael thought his dad worked at a factory job like everyone else in Appalachian Ohio.
When his dad retired in 1994, he was finally able to give Michael a tour of the lab he was in charge of, filled with electron microscopes and computers used to calibrate the machines that would then build jets and satellites.
“Seeing him in his mask, gloves, and lab coat in his lab located four stories underground, I finally realized he was far more complex than I had thought.”
The best advice Ellie Boyle has received from her dad is to spend time and money on experiences – not things. It took a while for the wisdom of those words from her dad, Joe Boyle, to truly sink in.
“I was little when he told me this, so it was hard for me to understand. I wanted the newest pair of shoes or whatever toy was hot at the time,” she said.
But as Ellie began enjoying traveling, she understood what her dad was trying to tell her. “I knew it was something I would want to keep doing when I got older,” she said of exploring the world.
Now, Ellie is a student at Bowling Green State University – studying to be a social studies teacher, just like her dad.
Since her dad is a cancer survivor, the time spent together is especially precious.
“Traveling with him and friends has taught me to live life to the fullest and spend time and make memories with the people I love,” Ellie said. “Now, we are both always saving up for the next big trip or concert to go to.”
Last summer, their travels took them to Quebec City and Montreal, and this summer they are going to see Madonna perform.
“While all of this is memorable and fun, the company of my dad is always the best part,” Ellie said.
Wood County Prosecuting Attorney Paul Dobson learned all about perseverance and hard work from his dad, John Dobson, who died at age 92 in 2020. He had served in the U.S. Navy during both WWII and Korea.
Paul’s dad dropped out of school in the ninth grade because he was 2½ years older than everyone else in his class. It was later determined that he was dyslexic.
Despite that, his dad scored in the 98th percentile on his GED tests, and raised seven children with his wife. When his dad was 55, his employer United Airlines pulled out of Toledo. He was offered early retirement from his job as a cargo agent.
“He took it knowing he would have to start a new career,” Paul said.
“But he struggled to read. So each night, my dad would sit with my mom and he would read to her until his reading ability became so good, he did it for pleasure,” Paul said.
At 55, his dad went back to school. He received his certificate in heating, ventilation and air conditioning and was voted MVP of his class.
“My dad had a story – a story that inspired a 15-year-old to work harder at school, to go to college, to go to law school, and to run for county prosecutor,” Paul said.
“I think my dad represents millions of heroes who lived their lives, worked hard for their families at jobs they often did not enjoy, and did all they could to instill that same honest, diligent, courteous ethic in their children,” Paul said. “Almost none of them did or will ever get the recognition they deserve.”
The words of Jerry Greiner’s dad still ring in his son’s ears.
“Kid, shut up and listen to your mother!”
Jerry, executive director of the Northwestern Water and Sewer District, knew enough to listen to his dad, who wasn’t one to debate issues.
“I’m not either it seems,” Jerry said.
His dad, Robert Greiner, was a lifelong farmer and Korean War veteran.
“That generation understood and accepted info as it was, as correct and truthful. Not so much today,” Jerry said.
His dad was drafted and dropped out of high school to join the Army for the Korean War.
“While there, he did not see direct combat duty, but the sights and sounds and stories lived with him all of his life. He spoke little of it,” Jerry said.
“He was serving our army in another war in another end of the world that none of us knew existed,” his son said. “Something for me to be proud of 60-70 years later.”
Sometimes really good lessons come after bad behavior. Becca Ferguson recalled getting into a bit of innocent trouble as a kid, tagging along with her brother and cousin.
“I did not throw my brother and cousin under the bus. I got a whipping just like the others,” said Becca, who is retired from BGSU and a community leader.
Afterward her father, James W Ferguson Jr., pulled Becca aside and gave her some valuable advice.
“Do not blindly follow anyone’s advice when you think it is wrong – even if it is your brother or cousin.”
Her dad, his sister and parents operated a pharmacy with a lunch counter on Jekyll Island, Georgia. He later went to work for the Glynn County Airport as the director and a pilot.
Later in life, Becca became very active in a political party and her dad told her she was wrong and should change parties. But she remembered his advice from years earlier.
“We had a great conversation because I thought his advice was wrong and he had taught me to not blindly follow advice when I thought it was wrong,” she said. “Lots of good laughter.”
Chris Smalley used to talk almost daily with his dad as he drove home from work as director of the Wood County Park District.
His dad shared many sage colloquialisms from days gone by, and many stick with Chris to this day.
“One of the most memorable was ‘do your best, even when nobody is watching.’ I think a lot of my work ethic and dedication comes from my dad,” Chris said.
“As a young kid, it didn’t hold as much meaning but as I got older and entered the workforce, it really clicked for me. I’ve tried to pass it along to my own children.”
His dad hated his name, Chester Louis Smalley II, so he always went by “Louie.” He was a lineman for the electric company for 38 years.
When Chris was in second or third grade, his dad was blasted from the top of a telephone pole and had to spend several months in the hospital recuperating. When he was healed, he went right back to work.
Years later Chris asked his dad about returning to the job. “I said, weren’t you afraid to go back up there? He said, ‘I had to go back. I can’t let the fear win.’ He had to overcome any fears rather than be burdened by them.”
Chris’ dad passed away in December of 2021. “I still miss him tremendously a year and a half later, but I will carry his words with me forever.”
Lindsay Durham’s dad, Dan, has worked as a farmer for the entirety of his life.
“Much of what I learned about farming can be applied to everyday life,” said Lindsay, who is office manager for Downtown BG and the Downtown Foundation.
She learned the best yields come from hard work and patience. Trying to take the easier way or take shortcuts will only hurt your crop.
“While I understood this logically as a child, it didn’t really click until I became an adult and was diagnosed with Bipolar II Disorder, Panic Disorder, PTSD, and ADHD,” Lindsay said. “Successfully managing these diagnoses is extremely difficult work. There are no shortcuts when it comes to mental health – one has to do the necessary work.”
By following her dad’s advice and putting in the work, Lindsay said she has yielded some amazing results.
“Had I attempted to take shortcuts, I wouldn’t be where I am today. My dad taught me that the best things in life are worth fighting for, and I believe that wholeheartedly,” Lindsay said. “Whether it be going back to college as a non-traditional student, fighting for the rights of others, or managing my mental health, it has always been worth it to put in the hard work.”
Crim Elementary Principal Zeb Kellough has worked to carry on the hard working tradition of his dad, Gary Kellough. His words of wisdom have stuck with Zeb.
“He would say, ‘You can waste my money, but don’t waste my time.’ He also said when you work, ‘Work at it with all of your heart. Anything that is worthwhile deserves your whole heart – because you are working for the Lord and not for your fellow man.’”
His father owned a successful construction company for years, and retired to teach with YouthBuilt, an Americorp organization helping young people learn the construction trade and transition to working in the construction field.
“These are values I live by today. I believe what takes time takes all of you,” Zeb said. “This explains my passion and I always want to do my best – not as a perfectionist because people know I am not perfect, but as a person. This hopefully shows in the work I do as a principal.”
Drew Hanna followed in his father’s footsteps, becoming an attorney along with his two older brothers. His dad, Martin Hanna, shared his fire for defending the little guy against powerful opponents.
There were three particular lessons that stand out for Drew.
First, always stand up when cross examining a witness.
Second, people deserve an attorney who will stand up for them.
“My dad spent his life in court. Some of his clients were folks whose homes were pitched on the blade of a bulldozer for a highway project – first the turnpike and then the Eisenhower Interstate Highway Program,” Drew said. “My dad would often tell his three sons: ‘You are not much of a lawyer if you cannot get your blood up to fight for a family’s home.’”
And third, don’t wither in the face of tough adversaries. Drew and his dad were once hired by a family who owned a home within the boundaries of Oak Openings, and the metropark was using the power of eminent domain to force these homeowners to sell and move. On the morning of trial, the judge could not be found.
“Without a judge, I thought we would pack up and head back to Bowling Green, and await a new trial date,” Drew said. “ My Dad’s advice to me was ‘This is the day to try the case. When fired upon – advance.’ So with that advice, we hustled around the bowels of the Lucas County Courthouse, finding a judge, and the trial went forward, with the jury being very sympathetic to our poor clients” and returning a suitable award.
Martin Hanna’s advice wasn’t limited to the courtroom. “My dad would often counsel me to ‘marry a happy one.’ Spoken as only a father can.”
Kristin Otley, director of BG Parks and Recreation, grew up as a military brat. Her dad, George Winters, was a colonel in the Air Force, working as an aeronautical engineer. After retiring, he worked in cyber security.
“Whenever we would take a different way to get somewhere or leave a light on in the house in a different room when we left, he would say it was ‘to keep the terrorists off guard.’”
“It kind of became a joke between my brother and I that we would say to each other,” Kristin said.
Her dad’s words never really made sense to Kristin until Sept. 11, 2001. Her husband Ben called to make sure her parents, who lived near Pittsburgh at the time, were all right.
“Ben commented that he couldn’t believe what had happened, and my dad’s comment was that he couldn’t believe that something like that hadn’t happened sooner,” Kristin said. “That’s when I thought, wow, he really wasn’t joking about that stuff when I was growing up.”
To this day, Kristin follows her dad’s advice.
“Sometimes I find myself taking different routes to get places now, just to mix it up,” she said.
