By JAN LARSON McLAUGHLIN
BG Independent News
Most mothers consider it their duty to pass on wisdom to their offspring. And sometimes, to the annoyance of their children, they repeat that advice to make sure it sticks. Over and over again.
So in celebration of mothers and the wisdom they impart, a few people around Bowling Green were asked to share the best and worst advice from their moms.
On the younger end of the scale, the advice tended to be more practical. Nine-year-old R.J. Agosti pondered a bit then it came to him.
“Well, my mom always tells me to never cross the road without holding an adult’s hand. You could get crushed,” he said.
Then he thought a bit more. “When you check out a library book, you should bring it back on time.” Not lifesaving advice, but important just the same.
His mom, Cathy Agosti remembered some deeper advice from her own mom. “Always treat others the way you want to be treated. That’s the best advice I got from my mom,” she said.
Kevin Guimbellot said his family moved a lot when he was young, so he was always the new kid at school. His mom taught him a valuable lesson in survival.
“The best advice she gave me was, if they’re laughing with you, they’re not picking on you,” he said. “So she’s responsible for me being a comedian.”
Guimbellot had no trouble recalling the worst advice his mother gave him. “She said, ‘your father knows where he’s going.’ We not only got lost, we got stuck in water.”
Tavion Torrez, 9, said his mom has never led him astray. “My mom hasn’t given me any bad advice.” Her best advice? “Ask before grabbing,” which Tavion said he always tries to do.
Some people had trouble pinpointing the most memorable advice from their moms. A couple young women declined since they had “complicated relationships” with their moms.
“My mother told me motherhood was going to be harder than I thought it was going to be,” and that proved to be right, said Amanda Bryant as she walked with her two children. “But maybe that’s because I have a 3-month-old and a 5-year-old.”
Prudence Brott said the best advice from her mom was “to always be kind.” The worst advice – that blue eyeliner looks good.
Her mom, Raye Brott, defended that bit of advice as good given its context. “Well, it wasn’t bad in the ‘80s. It was a cool thing.”
Raye Brott recalled her mom instilling the belief in unconditional giving without judging. “She always said, what you put out, you get back.”
Rick Kern remembered his mother’s words from decades ago when he and his buddies would talk about pretty girls at school.
“My mother said, ‘Son, beauty is only skin deep.” To which he said he would reply, “but Mom, ugly goes clear to the bone.”
Later in life, though, Kern realized the wisdom in his mom’s words. “At the time, I thought she was totally off base. But she was right.”
Difficult though it may be, Tara Bahnsen said she has tried to follow her mom’s advice. “My mom always told me to never go to bed mad. That always stuck with me,” Bahnsen said. “I try to do that with my kids and my husband.”
Though moms may think their teenagers aren’t listening, Scarlet Frishman, 15, had no trouble rattling off a couple bits handed down from her mom. The best advice – don’t be afraid to say yes to taking chances. “It’s expanded the opportunities I’ve gotten,” Frishman said.
The worst advice – repeatedly being told not to talk to strangers. “I really took the ‘don’t talk to strangers thing’ to heart and didn’t have any friends for a while.”
Though some people couldn’t recall a specific bit of advice, Michele Raine had to narrow them down the top two. “Wow, there’s been so much of it,” she said. Her mom was a retired nurse, and didn’t prescribe treating minor illness with bed rest. “Get up and move around and you’ll feel a lot better,” Raine said. “It does work.”
The worst advice? “’Wait until ….’ you fill in the blank,” Raine said.
Wade Born said his mother told him “just be yourself, no matter what anyone thinks.” To which Born said he tries to be steadfast. “I march to my own tune.”
Nine-year-old Jayden Dennis said her mom’s advice has been valuable. “Stand up for myself and my friends.”
Jayden’s mom, Karla Dennis recalled her mom’s practical advice. “Teaching me how to make a bed and clean a bathroom. Skills that will prevent you from starving,” she said.
(I asked my daughters about any golden advice I had bestowed, despite my fear of what they would say. My oldest, probably sensing the impending Mother’s Day holiday and realizing she hadn’t sent a card, said my advice was by example by doing volunteer work. “I hated going to all those volunteer activities as I was growing up, but looking back, I think it’s a huge part of who I am today,” she texted.
My youngest had a little different recollection. My best advice to her was “he’s nothing but trouble. Ignore him.”
Though I learned the most from my mom by watching how she lived her life, the saying she often repeated was “if you can’t say anything nice about someone, don’t say anything at all.” While I try to adhere to that advice in my personal life, I’ve picked the wrong career path to stick to it professionally. I think my mom would understand.)
